Thursday, February 07, 2008

Shut up already

Lately I have been avoiding people and situations just so I don't have to listen to bitching all of the time. One of my good friends Tams, who I have spent hours at a time talking to over the years, is a good example. I will admit that several of those hours have been spent with me doing the bitching;I really should not judge. It is just that it seems to have reached epic proportions. She has been teaching here for a couple of years now and I hate to say it but nobody can bitch like school teachers. With me being on the board I feel it is my duty to listen objectively whenever I am targeted as a listener. Even if I know that their points are valid after a point it becomes very exhausting. No matter how hard we try the school will never be perfect, their will always be personality clashes,and somebody will always be slacking off, and somebody will be picking up the slack. There has to be a point when we say there are these small problems that we are working on, but in general things are working.
Over a year ago I quit going to church and you would not believe how much more peaceful my life is now. I don't know what it is about church but members don't seem to be happy if they aren't complaining about somebody else. The music is either the wrong style, or the preacher is offensive, or somebody in the congregation is getting too much control. I really don't care if I ever attend church again.
Evading that question is tricky. Every time I get asked why I quit going to church I either blame it on apathy or laziness, which while there are a few reasons for my quiting those aren't two of them. One reason is the aforementioned problem with complaining. One is that since Labor day we have been eating a large breakfast most Sundays together as a family. My mom and sister come over and we cook a huge meal. My brother usually drives up from Guymon, and occasionally a few friends show up. I really don't want to spoil that. Even though most of my family members live relatively close it is easy to go a week without spending much time together. Between kids and their activities, and work, and our activities, extended family can be pushed out of the way. I love getting together and having an excuse to cook hash browns. The other reason is the big one. The church I had been attending was a baptist one. I had thought that it was okay to attend a baptist church and not consider oneself a baptist. For years I did just that with no real problems, but then the whole conservative push started strengthening and even in small independent churches Dobson's strangle hold was being felt. I like my preaching served without a side of politics. I cringe when I hear a preacher say that gay marriage is a threat to families. I find it curious that they never expand on that in a logical way and show the actual threat. How can I trust in a preacher who repeats lies without first checking them and cross referencing them with the Bible? How can I sit in a pew and smile and shake hands with people who are willing to accept these same lies from the preacher because it feels good to hate? The answer is I can't.


Tangeline said...

Hey! I am a complete stranger, but a Blogger sister (who tries to check a random blog every day to improve her own blog Karma) and just wanted to say ... I'm going though a similar church thing, for the first time in my life. (Out six months.) I just want the essentials of the faith, lived out, so they have power. Love and helping and pursuing what's truly true and ... all that. :) So, encouragements to you. You're not alone. And, as if I had to tell you, there really is still a living Christ, a living love, real helping and "true truth" out there somewhere.

Lynn said...

Thanks for the encouragement. In some ways my faith is stronger now that I have left the church and all of the bickering. Although without the fellowship it is easier let life push out time for praying.